exercise is good for thinking...

So tonight I was on the track at school and I just had this thought-

We push and push ourselves, sometimes to the breaking point. But what happens when we reach that breaking point?

Some of us have fought cancer and won for a while, until it came back.  Some go through other battles.  Some fight depression and win.  But they get to a point where they feel like they're backsliding.  And others push themselves so hard with a physical injury and they end up injuring themselves worse.

These thoughts led to something else. What happens when we reach these points? When we think we've accomplished the world and then something else unexpected happens, what do we do?  Do we let our failures keep us down? And is it out of fear? Or is it out of defeat?

Are we so willing to let our fears and chances of defeat keep us down?  What does that say for the people around us? The people that look up to us as teachers, mentors, a family members?

It says that we are willing to give up. And they will learn to do the same. And I pray to God that my family members never find me giving up.

You see, about five years ago, I was one of those people who was willing to give into my fears and I tried to give in. I let my depression spiral out of control and I was afraid to ask for help. And it wasn't just fear, I was ashamed too. I was ashamed to ask for the help that I knew I needed.  And then I found out what the knowledge of what I was going through did to my sister.  I had to learn to live my life again, and not give up.

So I pray that when life knocks you down, that you take baby steps (if that's what it takes) and get back up.  Don't admit defeat and don't give in to fear

A kiss from God

My entire day today has been a kiss from God.  I woke up this morning and got ready for church and the sermon was awesome.  


Then I came home, and just chilled around the house. I watched a movie, read some of my book, picked my room up a little, and made plans for tomorrow night.


And then I got a text. Marlise texted me asking what I was doing tonight. I didn't have any plans so I told her I would go to a bonfire with her.  And what a good decision that was! I left the house and went to Wegman's to get stuff to make s'mores with.  Then I stopped for gas and drinks and went on my way to meet her.  I ended up getting to her place before she was back from dinner, so like a creep, I sat in my car in the middle of all of these townhouses for a while.  But it was really good. I called Nick and the sweetheart he is, he kept me company on the phone until Marlise showed up.  That's when the adventure began...


We were on our way to Holly to get to the house that the fire was at.  And because I have no sense of direction and it was dark, Marlise was our navigator.  It was such a blast. I love adventure, and boy, was this one.  :) We made some wrong turns and went past the house we were going to, but we were still able to laugh and enjoy it.  No one freaked out because we got lost, and no one got upset (which is a first for me).  So we finally found the house we were looking for (which we missed because we didn't see the guy standing on the porch...he was dressed in black standing by the driveway...).  


But the entire time we were on our adventure, the laughter was non-stop and crazy.


And it was so nice.  


I hadn't laughed that hard in a while.


And then, my favorite part...


The fire.  Anthony had already started the fire and it was perfect for s'mores. So of course we dug into the marshmallows and chocolate.  And even though we lost some marshmallows due to the tragic fact they caught on fire, we still had fun.  We even got to see the stars (which is one of my favorite things to look at on nice nights- only where I have lived, it's hard to see them with the lights).  


So I would say that today was this amazing kiss from God. A reminder that spontaneous adventures are sometimes the best ones, and that there is something beautiful in every day. But you have to be willing to seek it out. And maybe it means that you get lost along the way, or have to turn around a few times, but it is an adventure nonetheless and I wouldn't trade it for anything.